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Writer's pictureEric Grate - Lead Writer

Your Boring Life Hasn't Been That Boring

Updated: Jan 2, 2023

Have you ever thought that your life is boring? Do you look back and wonder how on Earth you have managed to live such a mundane existence?


Most of us think of ourselves as living relatively uneventful lives. We go to school, maybe to college, get a job, marry, have a couple of kids, try to be good citizens, work, pay our bills, work, work, and work. Then we retire. Somewhere, in the midst of all that, we might have played a little ball, learned to strum a guitar, broken an arm, or visited Niagara Falls. Still, we wonder why we didn't do something to stand out. Why didn't we give people something to talk about?

In reality, our lives probably haven't been near as vanilla as they appear. Scratch the surface, and hidden treasures come to light. Odd talents, things you’ve done, places you’ve been, unique experiences, and strange habits. You know, those little things that set you apart or at least place you in select company. Some are genetic traits passed down from an unknown ancestor. Others are quirks we picked up somewhere along the way. While still others are the result of fate or being in the right place at the right time. Most, however, are brought on by our decisions, good or bad.


Spend enough time swapping stories at social events with friends and family, and interesting things start to surface. For example, I recently learned that my friend, Kevin, has swallowed every piece of gum he has ever chewed. I find that amazing! I know a woman who had a cat with six toes. That’s pretty interesting. It’s even more interesting, though, when you learn that her oldest son was also born with six toes. What are the odds? When I was a kid, I had a friend named Richard Miller, who had webbed toes on one foot. He said it made him swim faster.


At first glance, I guess you could say that my life has been pretty typical. Then consider this, I saw Big Foot stepping over a fence one night in July 1984 near Greenfield, OH. Don’t worry about the beer I drank. I know what I saw.


How about the fact that I am an ordained Deacon in the Southern Baptist Convention? Or that I have officiated my two oldest daughter’s weddings. It might not seem like a big deal, but most people go their entire lives and never officiate even one wedding ceremony.


1987 Nissan Pulsar

Did you know I wrecked every vehicle I owned between 1986 and 2004? That's like a half dozen vehicles and doesn't include my friend’s Trans Am or the two rental cars I wrecked. Am I proud of that? No. I am ashamed of it, and I thank God I never killed anyone. It's still a pretty remarkable record, though.


I have a high school diploma and a couple of semesters of community college under my belt. However, I still managed a successful twenty-year career as a Quality Engineer and taught myself to be a pretty decent photographer, barista, and fiction writer. Sometimes, it isn't what you have. It's what you make of it.


The United States Marine Corps is responsible for helping me experience many of my unique life events. To wit:

Nuke School

  • In 1984, at Parris Island, my Drill Instructor, Sgt. Andrus made me run five miles just four hours after having my wisdom teeth pulled. I’ve never experienced worse pain in my life. That was the Old Corps and those five miles built character.

  • In 1985 I was sent to school at the Naval base in Little Creek, VA, to learn how to arm and deploy nuclear weapons.

  • In 1986, I rode in the back of Junior Carter’s pickup truck from Camp LeJeune, NC, to Greenfield, OH, and nearly froze to death.

  • In 1987, I passed out in a gutter in Naples, Italy, and lay there until some American sailors scooped me up and took me back to my ship. Have you ever been to Naples? Probably not the wisest drunk decision I ever made.

  • Days later, my old buddy, Chad Gall, and I got lost in Rome and unknowingly walked through an anti-American protest. An Italian policeman suggested we go in the other direction.

  • Later that evening, after visiting several drinking establishments, we came around a corner, and the ancient Colosseum stood in front of us. I couldn’t believe it. For thirty-five years, I regretted being intoxicated at that moment and unable to appreciate what I was seeing. Fortunately, I was able to revisit Rome this summer and experience the Colosseum sober. It was mind-blowing.

  • In 1988, I played a crucial part in a 155 mm howitzer dropping three high explosive shells in an ammo dump parking lot at Camp LeJeune, NC, destroying a 1967 Ford Mustang and damaging a brand new pickup truck. Luckily, no one was hurt.


Sighting in an M198 155mm howitzer.

Just being a United States Marine is impressive if I think about it. Big deal, you say? Heck, you probably know lots of Marines. The truth is that less than 0.05% of all Americans who have ever lived have been United States Marines. Pretty cool, huh?


I have had the good fortune to have traveled quite a bit. To date, I have been to thirty-eight states, the District of Columbia, Puerto Rico, and ten foreign countries, including Canada, Mexico, the Bahamas, Haiti, Spain, Portugal, France, Italy, Tunisia, and Japan. There are a lot of exciting stories hidden in those travels.


Between 1989 and 2005, I had the opportunity to visit Japan several times on business. Once in Hiroshima, several Japanese people approached me to apologize for World War Two. Given the locale, that was a little awkward.

In the early 2000s, I got caught smuggling Cuban cigars into the country from Mexico. Somehow, I convinced the customs agent that I had no idea a trade embargo had been in effect against Cuba for over forty years.. He tore up my cigars, threw them in the trash, and let me pass.


In 2013, Michelle and I were driving through Osawatomie, Kansas (population 4,225), when the water pump went out of our car. I pulled the car into the town's only garage just as it started overheating. Expecting the worst, I asked the owner if he could fix it. Not only did he assure me that he could, but he sent someone to Kansas City to pick up a water pump, took the car he was working on off the rack, pulled ours on, and had us on the road in three hours. Not only that, but the bill was no more than I would have paid had it happened at home. Why did he do all of that for strangers? Because Michelle and I were guests in his town and we needed help. I will never forget that. Osawatomie is a lovely little town full of friendly people. We walked around, visited several shops, and left, knowing that good people were out there. We just had to take the time to notice them.

A pitcher that Michelle bought in Osawatomie, KS.

It's not bragging or boastfulness that leads me to share these things with you. Most of them leave little or no room for strutting about anyway. They are just things that happened. Instead, I share them to prove that my life hasn't been that boring. If you take inventory of your life, you will discover the same about yourself. You are incredibly unique. Think of how many people tell stories you take center stage in daily. Doesn't that put a smile on your face? It does mine.


I'll leave you with this; sometimes, the things you don't do or have never done make you interesting. As a child, I played in Paint Creek and hung out at Rocky Fork Lake nearly every day in the summer. I graduated from a high school that had a swimming pool and took swimming classes for five years. I qualified as an S2 swimmer in the Marines. I have been in countless swimming pools and have owned a pool with a diving board for the last six years. The result? I am a terrible swimmer and have nearly drowned twice. Once as a teenager in the pool, after hours, at Buckeye Hills Country Club, and again a few years ago while snorkeling in the Bahamas. To this day, I NEVER have dove headfirst into the water. Not one time in my life. I have always gone feet first. Weird huh?


I want to hear about the things that make you unique. Tell me about them in the comments.



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2 Comments


grate1111
Dec 28, 2022

Eric, I didn't know you did a lot of those things. Surprised me I thought you were a good boy all this time. Myself I don't think i have done anything that would amount to one hell of beans. I remember taking a test i think in the 9th grade that was supposed to tell you what job you would be good at in life. One thing it said was i shouldn't operate heavy equipment. One job it said i would be good at was a circus clown. I operated heavy equipment and heavy type machinery for over 30 years. I don't know about being a circus clown. I haven't tried that yet, even though the women at the schoo…

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I tried to keep a lot of undercover so I didn’t disappoint Mom. Don’t tell her.

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